Amusing Conversations and Questions

Ugandan teenish girl: Hello, how are you?!
Me and Steph: Fine thanks, and how are you?
(this is the standard Ugandan greeting exchange - you need to ask how the other person is, the answer is always 'fine')
UG: Oh fine, fine.  You're American?
Us: Yes, we are.
UG: Are you born again? (strong accent, btw)
me to steph: uh, what'd she say?  steph: I think she asked if we were born again.  me: huh? seriously, like religion?  steph: yeah.
Me to UG: Um, sure. (trying not to rock the boat)

Now, this conversation has happened more than once, yes, we have literally been asked if we were born again or various other religion inquiries within 30 seconds of meeting someone.  My answer tends to vary, eventually I'll probably tell them I'm Jewish, or something crazy.  Religion is important to Ugandans, but supposedly they don't care what you believe, just that you're religious (haha, strike one for me!); however, we've mostly been asked about some form of Christianity. 

In the village where we've been doing the children's holiday (vacation) program, there is a young teacher we've made friends with, her name is Immaculate.
As we're having a conversation about weekend plans:
Imma: So, are you going for prayers?
Me: nope
I: Ohh, you don't go to church?
Me: nope.
I: ohh (laughing)
Now, really though - if you were traveling in a foreign country would you find a church to go to? where they likely don't speak your language? I think not.

Walking through the village with Imma:
I: So in your home country do you have houses like this? (referring to the mud, stick and other materials of the like, shacks)
Us: Um, no.  we definitely don't. 
Now, this girl is in university, so we're wondering if they never learn anything about other countries...?  I know she's seen American movies too...did you see mud houses in those!?

Watching the kids do activities:
Imma:  Do you have that in your country - shared labor? (referring to the children carrying their baby siblings)
Me: (laughing) hell no! we definitely don't have 5yr. olds carrying babies on their backs!  Typically only adults or older children would be allowed to carry someone's baby around. 
It really is crazy- in the villages the older (barely) kids carry around and care for the babies and toddlers all day.  I'm fairly certain I've never seen a 7yr old in the states even capable of this!

Convo with my wannabe Ugandan boyfriend (apparently he didn't want to be friends):
Him: So, I've been really giving what you said earlier a lot of thought (mind you, 'earlier' was like 45min ago), and I think I can and should be your boyfriend for your last week here. Seriously.
Me: (laughing) Uh, no. 

On the way home in the taxi:
Me: are you cold? why are you closing the window?
him: cold? no! .... you can't be cold when you're sitting next to a hot chick!
me: oh, very funny
him: no, really, there can't be coldness when there's hotness....you're not always getting to sit by a hot chick, blah, blah
I'm thinking: geez, call me a hot chick one more time and i am going to punch you!  Btw, he'd referred to me this way multiple times already, and it sounds really strange with the accent.  Clearly, my patience had run out for the day! ;)

Random guy on the street after we got Osama:
Standard greeting exchange
him: you're American?
me: yes!
him: Obama's your president!
me: yes he is
him: you got Osama!  Obama killed Osama!
Me: well actually, he didn't kill him, and the events to start this process started long before Obama...blah, blah...
Before I knew it I'd opened my mouth to start trying to explain this and immediately knew I should have just agreed and kept my mouth shut.  First, he doesn't care.  Second, he can't understand what I'm saying!  the only english he knows is: Hi, how are you, and Obama!